On Her Own Read online

  “Jah, sure.” Barbara opened the door wider and bid them in. “I just put Davey in his cradle, but he’s wide awake.”

  John and Nadine followed Barbara to the living room, and John took a seat on the sofa while Nadine rushed over to the wooden cradle sitting near the rocking chair.

  “He’s so siess,” Nadine said dreamily.

  “I think he’s pretty sweet, too.” Barbara smiled. “Would you like to hold him?”

  “Oh, jah,” Nadine replied with an eager nod. She took a seat in the rocking chair, and Barbara placed the baby in her arms.

  “He feels so good. I can’t wait until I’m married and have some bopplin of my own.”

  “Babies are a lot of work, but they bring many joys,” Barbara said as she took a seat on the opposite end of the sofa from John.

  John cleared his throat a couple of times. “We missed you at Dan Hilty’s funeral. How have you been getting along?” he asked.

  “I’m still feeling kind of tired, but I’m doing okay.”

  “Would you like me to send one of my girls over to help out? Betty’s taken a job at the general store, but I’m sure either Hannah or Nadine would be glad to help you.”

  “I appreciate the offer, but I’m managing with the help of my mamm.”

  “How’s Samuel doing in the harness shop? Is he able to keep up with the work now that you’re not there to help?”

  Barbara shook her head. “Due to Dad’s arthritis, he struggles to get many things done. Paul Hilty’s going to be helping in the shop for a while, so between the two of them, they’ll be able to keep things going until I’m able to work again.”

  John’s eyebrows drew together. “Are you sure you ought to return to work?”

  Barbara nodded. “I enjoy working in the harness shop.”

  “That may be so, but it’s hard work.”

  Barbara simply watched Nadine rock the baby.

  “Have you considered selling the shop?”

  She shook her head. “As long as I’m able to keep it open, I won’t sell the place.”

  Unsure of what to say, John leaned against the sofa, folded his arms, and listened to the steady tick-tock of the clock mingling with the rhythmic creak-creak of the rocking chair. Finally, John rose to his feet. “Guess we should get going. I want to pay a call on Margaret Hilty and see how she’s doing.”

  “I was sorry to hear of her loss,” Barbara said as she stood. “Will she be moving in with her daughter and son-in-law?”

  John shook his head. “From what I’ve heard, Karen and Jake plan to rent their house out and move in with Margaret. It’ll be easier for her if she’s not alone, and I don’t think she wants to leave her home right now.”

  “I can understand that.” When the baby started squirming, Barbara leaned over and took him from Nadine. “I think he’s about ready to be fed.”

  Nadine cast a furtive glance in John’s direction. “I wish we didn’t have to leave so soon.”

  “I think we’d better,” he said, moving toward the door.

  Barbara walked with them, and John was about to step onto the porch when an idea struck him. “You know, Margaret could use some encouragement, and since you lost your husband and know what it feels like to be left alone, maybe you could be helpful to Margaret.”

  “Helpful how?”

  “Well, I know you can’t get out much right now, with having a new boppli and all, but would it be all right if I encourage Margaret to come by and visit?”

  “Certainly.”

  “Margaret’s really good with flowers, so maybe she’d even be willing to help weed your garden. I’ll make mention of it when I get over to her house.”

  “Well, I—”

  “I’ll be back to see you again soon.” John smiled, gave Nadine a little nudge, and headed for his buggy. If things went as he hoped, in a few months he’d have a new wife, and then Barbara wouldn’t have to work at the harness shop anymore.

  Chapter 4

  Paul was about to enter Zook’s Harness Shop Saturday morning, but he slowed his pace, still unsure if he had made the right decision. Maybe it won’t be so bad. Barbara did say she would be staying at the house to do paperwork and tend to her children. He would pretty much be in charge of things since Samuel Raber had arthritis and, according to Barbara, didn’t know a great deal about the business.

  As Paul opened the door and stepped into the shop, he drew in a deep breath. The smell of raw leather, savory neat’s-foot oil, and pungent dye hung in the air. He glanced around. Several harnesses and bridles were looped from ceiling hooks. Enormous sheets of loosely rolled leather, looking like cinnamon sticks, poured out of shelves along one side of the shop. Hundreds of snaps, rings, buckles, and rivets nestled in open boxes lined neatly along one wall. Piled on the cement floor were bits of leather scraps, resembling spaghetti noodles. It was a comfortable feeling to be inside the harness shop. He’d only been gone from his cousin’s place a few days, and already he missed it. But Andy and his part-time helpers were doing okay without him, and Andy didn’t seem to mind if Paul stayed to help Barbara in her hour of need.

  Paul saw no sign of Samuel, so he headed toward the back of the building. Two oversized sewing machines run by an air compressor sat side by side on a heavy table. A row of tools spilled out of round wooden holders on the wide workbench nearby. “Hello,” he called. “Anybody here?”

  Barbara’s father stepped out of the back room, limping slightly as he ambled toward him. When Samuel clasped Paul’s shoulder, Paul took notice of the older man’s red, arthritic fingers.

  Paul cleared his throat. “I. . .uh. . . assume Barbara told you I’d be working here awhile.”

  Samuel smiled through the reddish beard that matched his hair. “It’ll be good to have you helping.” He held up his hands. “These fingers don’t work so good anymore. And to tell you the truth, when Barbara’s not here to show me what to do, I often flounder.”

  Paul nodded. “I’ll do whatever I can to help.”

  Samuel made a sweeping gesture. “Assembling a harness can be complicated. It involves dozens of snaps, straps, and buckles, all connected in a particular way.” He grinned, and his cheeks flamed. “Guess you already know that, what with working at a harness shop in Pennsylvania and all.”

  “Jah, I’ve been working for my cousin Andy.”

  “You like it better there?”

  Paul shrugged. “It’s okay. But Lancaster County has become awful crowded.”

  Samuel frowned. “I guess some folks don’t mind crowded areas, but I’d never want to live anyplace but here. There’s nothing like the quiet, peaceful life; that’s what I’ve got to say.”

  “So what jobs are needing to be done right now?” Paul asked.

  Samuel motioned toward the desk near the front door. “There’s a folder with all the job orders over there, and I’m way behind.”

  Paul rolled up his cotton shirtsleeves, eager to get busy. “I’ll take a look-see.”

  Alice released a weary sigh as she placed a kettle of water on the stove to heat. Zachary and Joseph were playing in the living room, but ever since the boys had arrived, Aaron had just sat at the kitchen table and doodled on a piece of paper.

  “Aaron, why don’t you take your brothers and go outside for a while,” Alice suggested. “It’s a nice day, and the fresh air and sunshine will do you all some good.”

  “Don’t feel like playing.”

  “What do you feel like doing?”

  Aaron shrugged.

  “Would you like to help me bake some cookies?”

  “Bakin’ is women’s work.”

  Alice sat down beside him. “That’s not true, Aaron. Look at Noah Hertzler; he’s always helping his wife in the kitchen, and he bakes lots of tasty treats that he shares with others.”

  Aaron grunted. “I don’t care about bakin’.”

  “But you enjoy eating the cookies I make.”

  He nodded, and his eyes brightened some. “You got any
oatmeal cookies, Grandma?”

  She chuckled and patted his arm. “No, but I can surely make some.”

  “That’d be good.”

  “Are you sure you wouldn’t like to help?”

  “Naw.”

  “Why don’t you go out to the harness shop and see if you can help your grossdaadi and Paul?”

  Aaron’s nose wrinkled like some foul odor had come into the room. “If it was just Grandpa workin’ in the shop, I might, but not with Paul Hilty there.”

  Alice frowned. “What have you got against Paul?”

  Aaron shrugged.

  “You know your mamm’s not able to work in the harness shop right now,” Alice said. “So she’s hired Paul to take her place until she gets her strength back.”

  “Couldn’t she have found someone else?”

  “No one in these parts knows much about harness making, and Paul works in a harness shop in Pennsylvania.”

  Aaron made little circles on the paper with his pencil. Finally, he pushed back his chair and stood. “Guess I’ll go see what Joseph and Zachary are up to.”

  “Okay. I’ll call you when I’ve got some cookies baked.”

  Aaron strolled out of the kitchen, and Alice got out a box of tea for the water she’d heated. She was worried enough about Barbara these days. Now with Aaron acting so moody, she had one more thing to be concerned about.

  Barbara glanced at the battery-operated clock above the refrigerator as she poured herself a cup of tea. It was eight fifteen, and she’d sent the boys over to her mother’s. She hadn’t slept well because the baby had been fussy and demanded several feedings. She wished she could go back to bed, but she had some bills to pay, as well as a stack of paperwork that needed attention.

  Barbara yawned and moved over to the window. An open buggy sat next to the harness shop. She figured it must be Paul’s. Most of their customers didn’t show up this early.

  Barbara felt a sense of relief knowing her father would have help in the shop, but part of her bristled at the thought of anyone taking her place. She so missed working with leather.

  “I need to eat enough, rest more, and get my strength back so I can work in the shop again,” she murmured as she took a seat at the table. “Then Paul will be free to return to Pennsylvania.”

  Barbara’s hand trembled as she set down her cup. She’d been much weaker since Davey’s birth than she had been after her other boys were born. Maybe she’d done too much during her pregnancy. Perhaps she’d lost more blood with this delivery and that had left her feeling so tired. Or maybe she was emotionally drained, having had to go through the ordeal without her husband by her side.

  She massaged her temples, trying to keep the threatening tears at bay. Feeling sorry for herself wouldn’t help a thing. She was on her own to care for her family, and because she was so weak, she needed Paul’s help.

  Barbara stood. “What I need to do is go upstairs and check on the boppli. Then I’ll get busy with those bills.”

  Paul stood at the workbench, focused on the job at hand. Connecting the breast strap of a harness to a huge, three-way snap required some fancy looping. His hand wove in and out, neatly tacking the strap at the end.

  “That’s some fine work,” Samuel said as he peered over Paul’s shoulder. “It’s clear you know exactly what you’re doing.”

  Paul shrugged. “Took me awhile to get the hang of it when I first started, but I’ve done this type of thing many times.”

  Samuel stepped over a pile of dirty leather straps and buckles. “Always got lots of harnesses people bring in to get cleaned and repaired.” He grunted. “If they’d take better care of ’em, they’d pretty well last forever.”

  “You’re right about that,” Paul agreed. “Folks need to bring their harnesses in for cleaning and oiling at least once a year, but unfortunately, many don’t.”

  Samuel bent down and picked up a leather strap. “With my arthritic hands, cleaning things like this is about the only thing I do well here in the shop. I put the dirty ones in a tub of warm water with saddle soap, then scrub ’em real good.”

  Paul was about to comment, but a truck rumbled into the yard and stopped in front of the shop. A middle-aged English man ambled in, lugging a worn-out saddle, which he dropped on the floor. “Need to have this gone over. Can you do that for me, Sam?”

  “If it’s just a good cleaning you’re after, I can manage it fine. But if the saddle needs a lot of fixing, then here’s your man.” Samuel motioned to Paul. “Paul Hilty, meet Frank Henderson. He lives up near Springfield.”

  “It’s nice to meet you,” Paul said, extending his hand.

  “Howdy.” As Frank returned the handshake, he looked a bit perplexed. “Where’s Barbara? Isn’t she working here anymore?”

  “My daughter had a baby a few days ago, so she’s taking some time away from the shop. Paul’s from Pennsylvania. He came here for his brother’s funeral and has agreed to help out until she’s able to handle things again.”

  Paul squatted down and studied the worn-looking saddle. It needed more than soap and water, but he was sure it could be salvaged. “We’ll give it a good going-over.” He looked up at Samuel. “You want to write up the work order, or should I?”

  Samuel shrugged. “Makes no never mind to me. Until Barbara returns, you’re the boss.”

  Paul thought about Barbara and how pale and thin she appeared. As far as he was concerned, a delicate woman like her ought to be at home caring for her kinner, not trying to run a business—especially one that often required heavy lifting.

  “Why don’t you write up the order?” Paul said to Samuel. “I’ll get back to work on that breast strap.” He nodded at Frank. “Nice to meet you. We’ll drop a card in the mail when your saddle is done.”

  “Appreciate that.”

  Paul turned back to his job.

  Two more customers showed up that morning. Paul took time out to meet them and see what they needed, but he left the paperwork to Barbara’s father.

  A bit later, Samuel touched his shoulder. “Aaron just popped by to say that there’s food on the table. Are you coming up to the house for the noon meal?”

  Paul had been so caught up in his work that he hadn’t realized it was lunchtime. “How come the boy’s home from school today?” he asked.

  “It’s Saturday. No school until Monday, and then only a few weeks until the kinner will be out for the summer.”

  “Oh.” Paul had been out of school for so long that he’d forgotten the summer break began in early May.

  “So you comin’ up to the house or not?”

  “I. . .uh. . .brought my lunch pail along. Figured I’d eat out here.”

  Samuel shook his head. “No way. You been working hard all morning and need a hot meal. Alice has probably got a place set for you at the table. Believe me when I say you don’t want to disappoint that wife of mine.”

  “Well, I—”

  “Barbara and the boys will be joining us, and I’m sure she’d like to hear how your first day has been going.”

  “Guess I’d better say jah, then.”

  Samuel grinned. “Glad to hear it.”

  Chapter 5

  How come such a big meal today?” Barbara asked when she saw all the food sitting out in her mother’s kitchen.

  Mom placed a platter of ham in the center of the table and smiled. “I figured your daed would be bringing Paul Hilty up to the house for lunch, and I know how hungry those men can be after working all morning.”

  An image of David popped into Barbara’s head. She remembered him saying many times that the noon meal needed to be the heartiest of the day. “Fuels the body after working all morning and gives one strength for the afternoon,” he used to say.

  Barbara’s mother touched her arm. “You still look tired. Didn’t you get a nap this morning?”

  “Every time I tried to lie down, Davey started to fuss. Now the little fellow’s fast asleep in the portable crib we set up in your spare bed
room.”

  Mom clucked her tongue. “Isn’t that the way? As a baby, your sister Clara was always wide awake when she should have been sleeping.”

  “You had five daughters with completely different personalities, and I’ve been blessed with four boys who are equally different.” Barbara sighed. “I wish my sisters still lived nearby.”

  “I miss them, too,” Mom agreed. “But I’m glad you’re close by.”

  Barbara smiled. “What can I do to help with the meal?”

  Mom shook her head. “Everything’s about ready, so sit down and relax until the mannsleit and buwe come inside.”

  “Speaking of the boys, where are my other three? Haven’t seen or heard from them all morning.”

  “A few minutes ago, I sent Aaron to the harness shop to tell the menfolk lunch was ready. The two younger ones have been playing on the back porch.”

  Barbara sat down. “I hope Aaron does what you asked. He used to help his daed with little things in the shop, but since David’s death, he seems to have lost interest.” She sighed. “Now I can barely get him to go in the shop at all.”

  Mom placed a bowl of coleslaw on the table. “The boy probably misses his daed, and being in the shop is a reminder that David’s gone.”

  “Maybe so.” Tears sprang to Barbara’s eyes. “Aaron reminds me of David in so many ways. He enjoys working with his hands, and he’s got his daed’s determined spirit.”

  “Maybe someday, when you’re ready to give up the shop, he’ll take it over.”

  Barbara nodded. “He’s not old enough to do a whole lot out there yet, but after he finishes eighth grade and is ready to learn a trade, we’ll see if he has any interest in the harness business.”

  Her mother smiled. “If he takes after his mamm, he surely will.”

  When Paul entered the Rabers’ kitchen, the first person he saw was Barbara. She sat at the table, holding the baby in her arms. He halted inside the door and stared. The sight of her kissing the infant’s downy, dark head brought a lump to his throat. He’d seen plenty of women with babies, but never had it affected him like this. It made him long to be a husband—but a father? No way! He didn’t have the patience for that.