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Elsie’s chest felt heavy. She stared at the sponge she held. “It’s hard to stay positive during times like these, but for our sister’s sake, we must encourage her to look for the good in things. As Dad used to say, ‘This too will pass, and things are bound to go better soon.’”
Akron
Joel blinked against the light streaming through the blinds in his living-room. He’d spent another miserable night on the couch, which had probably done his back more harm than good.
Groaning, he forced himself to sit up and winced when he tried to straighten. How am I going to do any work today when I’m still in pain? Joel had spent the last four days alternating between using a heating pad and an ice pack on his back. Probably should see a chiropractor, massage therapist, or doctor—maybe all three. This isn’t getting better on its own.
Joel rubbed the sides and top of his head. His hair felt greasy. He really ought to take a shower, but his back hurt worse when he stood too long. His cold lingered, which didn’t help, either. He wished he could call on someone to take care of him. He’d tried calling Kristi several times over the weekend, but she hadn’t returned even one of his calls. He’d called Tom last night, but his friend couldn’t help because he’d gotten stuck at his folks’ in bad weather and didn’t know when he’d make it home.
Guess I could call one of my sisters, but they’d have to hire a driver to bring them here. He winced. Bet they wouldn’t even care that I’m here alone with a bad back and a horrible cold.
Joel picked up his cell phone and searched for local chiropractors. He found one a few miles from where he lived and dialed the number. After explaining his predicament, he was given an appointment for three o’clock that afternoon. It would not be easy, but somehow he’d muster the strength to drive there. In the meantime, he would force himself to take a shower and put on some clean clothes. He wrinkled his nose. “Bet I smell as bad as I look.”
“How’d your weekend go? Did you have a nice Thanksgiving?” Dorine asked when Kristi arrived at the nursing home.
“It was good. I spent Thanksgiving Day with my parents, went shopping on Friday, attended another quilting class with my mom Saturday, and had dinner at my folks’ house after church on Sunday.” Kristi smiled. “How was yours?”
Dorine pressed her palm against her chest. “Thanksgiving was kind of rough here at work, and when I had a late meal at my boyfriend’s house that evening, I had a hard time feeling thankful.”
“What happened?”
“Mr. Riggins had a heart attack and was rushed to the hospital.” Pausing to pick up a magazine someone had dropped on the floor, Dorine’s shoulders drooped. “It happened in the lunchroom, and the patients who were eating there became quite upset. It took a while to get them settled down.”
“I’m sorry to hear it.” Kristi spoke softly. “Have you heard how he’s doing?”
“No, but then I was off Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, same as you.”
“What about Audrey? How’s she doing?” Kristi slipped off her hat and matching gloves, as well as her coat, and put them away.
Dorine gave a slow shake of her head. “She was in a lot of pain on Thanksgiving, and the medication kept her sleeping most of the day. She’s getting nourishment from her IV, but even when she’s awake, she doesn’t want to eat anything.”
Kristi’s arms pressed tightly against her sides. “I wish I had worked Thanksgiving. I could have sat with her awhile and maybe coaxed her to eat a little something.”
“It wouldn’t have done any good, Kristi. Short of a miracle, Audrey doesn’t have much longer to live.” Dorine’s eyes filled with sadness as she looked down the hall toward Audrey’s room.
Tears stung Kristi’s eyes, but she tried to suppress her emotions. She enjoyed tending to the patients who lived here, but at times such as this, she felt like quitting her job and looking for work that didn’t involve sickness and death. It was hard not to become depressed while performing her nursing duties—especially when faced with the imminent death of Audrey, who had helped her get through the breakup with Joel. “Think I’ll go to Audrey’s room right now to check on her.”
“Go right ahead, but don’t be surprised if you find her sleeping.”
As Kristi started down the hall, Dorine called, “Hey, Kristi, before you go, I could use a little help.” She pushed the vitals cart along.
Kristi paused. “Sure, what do you need?”
“A new patient came in earlier, and I could use your help turning him. He was transferred here from the hospital and needs a lot of assistance right now.”
“Okay, I’ll follow you in.” Kristi motioned for Dorine to lead the way.
When they finished getting the gentleman situated a short time later, Kristi headed down the hall to see Audrey. She found the dear woman in bed, hooked up to an IV. Her eyes were shut. Her skin was nearly as pale as the bed sheets.
Kristi stood at the foot of Audrey’s bed and closed her eyes. Heavenly Father, as much as I want to keep her here, please don’t let Audrey suffer. If it’s not Your will to heal her, then please take her home to be with You.
She kept her eyes closed and reflected on the times Audrey had ministered to her when she’d been trying to deal with the end of her relationship with Joel. “If only there was something I could do for you,” she whispered.
“There is. You can sit beside my bed.”
Kristi’s eyes snapped open. She was surprised to see the elderly woman looking at her, a slight smile on her thin lips. “Oh, you’re awake. I’m sorry if I disturbed you.”
Audrey lifted a bony finger, beckoning her to come closer.
Kristi took a seat beside the bed and reached out to clasp this special patient’s hand.
“Where have you been? It seems like such a long time ago that we talked.” Audrey spoke so faintly, Kristi had to lean closer in order to make out her words.
“I spent Thanksgiving with my parents, and then I had Friday, Saturday, and Sunday off. I’ll be working for the next five days, so we’ll get to see each other often.”
“The cancer’s getting worse. My time is drawing close.” Audrey’s breathing was raspy. Kristi could tell it was all she could do to keep her eyes open.
“You don’t need to talk. I’ll just sit here with you and hold your hand.” Kristi struggled to keep from breaking down. It was difficult to see how quickly this sweet lady had gone downhill.
“I—I wish I could be up and around. I don’t like being stuck in this bed. It makes me feel worthless.”
Kristi gently patted Audrey’s cold hand. “You are not worthless. Your comforting words and heartfelt prayers have been a big help to me.” She glanced away briefly, blinking to keep tears from falling onto her cheeks. This was not a time to give in to her emotions. She wanted to be strong for Audrey’s sake.
“Are you still praying for that young man—Joel, isn’t that his name?”
“Yes, I’ve been praying.” Kristi chose not to mention that Joel had called several times over the weekend and left messages. He’d sounded so desperate, it had been hard not to return his calls. But Kristi felt sure he’d only been trying to prey on her sympathy in hopes of getting her back. In one of his messages, Joel had said he’d changed and would never say or do anything to hurt her again. Words were cheap. Joel had done nothing to prove he’d changed. Even if he had, Kristi wasn’t sure she could ever believe him. A zebra doesn’t change its stripes. She brought her hand up to her chest. If he really had changed, he wouldn’t have quit coming to church.
Turning her focus back to Audrey, Kristi said, “I’ve been praying for you, too.”
“Thank you, dear.” Audrey’s eyelids fluttered, then closed.
Kristi could tell she had fallen asleep by the way her chest rose slowly and fell. Thinking the gentle woman needed her rest, she stood and slipped quietly out of the room. She would check on Audrey a little later. Right now, other patients needed her care.
CHAPTER 3
Millersburg, Ohio
Elsie shivered, covering herself with her shawl as she hurried down the driveway to the phone shack. It had been a week since Doris got out of the hospital, and she still needed help. But Elsie noticed some improvement. Doris got around better on her crutches. Her color was back, too, and she appeared to be more rested. Of course, her broken leg and bumped head would mend, but it would take longer for Doris’s heart to heal after the loss of her baby. She and Brian would continue to need their family for spiritual and moral support in the days ahead.
As soon as Elsie checked for messages, she’d head for Doris’s house. Arlene would join her again, only this time instead of cleaning, they planned on baking. Christmas was less than three weeks away, so baking some things ahead and freezing them would jumpstart their holiday preparations.
She stepped into the phone shack, glancing quickly around for spiders lurking about, and turned on the answering machine. There was only one message—from Joel. Elsie suspected he’d called to ask if the will had been found. She brought her hand up to her cheek. I should have called him before now. Every time she’d thought to do it, something came up and it didn’t get done.
As Elsie listened to the message, her jaw clenched. Is that all he ever thinks about? With a feeling of dread, she dialed Joel’s number. Elsie was surprised when he picked up the phone. Quite often when she called, she would get his voice mail.
“Hi, Joel, it’s Elsie.”
“Oh, good. I’m glad you called. I’ve been lying around with a bad back and a cold, wondering if you’ve found the will.” His voice sounded raspy, like he’d been coughing a lot.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m some better, but I was pretty much flat on my back for the better part of a week.”
“I’m sorry to hear that.”
“So, about Dad’s will … Have you had any luck?”
Elsie shook her head over Joel’s misplaced priorities. “Doris fell down the stairs on Thanksgiving, so the search for the will has been postponed until she’s fully recovered.”
Silence on the other end.
“Joel, did you hear what I said?”
“Yeah. Is Doris hurt bad?”
“She broke her leg. Worse than that, she lost her boppli.”
“What baby?”
Elsie wrapped her finger around the phone cord and swallowed hard. It was difficult to talk about it—especially with Joel, whom she was sure wouldn’t understand.
“I didn’t know she was expecting a baby.”
“Doris found out she was expecting a few weeks ago. Since she and Brian have been married over six years, they didn’t think they could have any children.” Her shoulders slumped as she continued to speak. “They were so excited about it, and now their hopes have been crushed.”
“I’m sorry to hear this, but I’m also disappointed I wasn’t notified of her pregnancy or told that she’d fallen and lost the baby.” He coughed a couple of times and let out a heavy sigh.
Elsie heard the frustration in her brother’s voice. “I’m sorry, Joel. I assumed Doris had told you when she found out she was pregnant.” She paused for a breath. “It’s no excuse, but things have been hectic since her accident. Arlene and I have been going over to help Doris every day, so I kept forgetting to call you.”
Once more, the phone became silent on the other end.
“Joel, are you still there?”
“Yeah. Just trying to process all this. I’ll try to stop by and see Doris as soon as I have some free time. Thanks to my back going out, I lost a week’s worth of work, so there’s some catching up to do. I need money coming in more than anything right now.”
She gripped the phone so tightly her fingers throbbed. Hearing him reminded her of the funeral—the way Joel had disregarded their father’s passing for the sake of getting his share of the inheritance. Even when he made an effort to be sympathetic, his own needs always came first. If your family was important to you, you’d make the time to see Doris right away, she thought with regret.
Joel cleared his throat. “About the missing will … Since you and Arlene are busy helping Doris right now, maybe I should go over to Dad’s place and search for it again.”
Elsie’s jaw clenched. “So you don’t have time to see Doris right now, but you could make time to search for the will?”
“Well, I—”
“How can you even be thinking about Dad’s will when our sister is in pain and grieving the loss of her baby?” Elsie was ready to slam the receiver and end this conversation. She’d had enough of Joel being so self-centered, especially toward their family. But she drew in a slow, steady breath and allowed her brother to respond.
“Okay, you’re right, but before we hang up, I was wondering what you would think about selling Dad’s horses.”
“What?” Her voice grew sharper. “Why are you bringing that up?” What is he thinking?
“Because we could all use the money—especially Doris. I’m sure she’s gonna have some hospital and doctor bills to pay.” Joel’s tone grew louder, too.
Elsie sighed in frustration. “Until Dad’s will is found and we know how he wanted things divided up, we should not sell anything. I’m sure our sisters would agree with me on that.”
He grunted. “Of course they would. You three have always sided against me.”
She couldn’t argue the point, but it was because Joel had made so many unwise decisions and given unreasonable demands. It would be easier for Elsie to side with him if he put others’ needs ahead of his own.
“Listen, I need to bid on a job right now. I’ll forget about Dad’s will for the moment. Let me know when you’re ready to start looking for it again.” Joel hung up without saying goodbye.
Elsie pressed down on the receiver and got up from her chair. Her muscles were tight, and her toes felt numb when she stepped out of the phone shack. The conversation with Joel had been unnerving, but she didn’t have time to dwell on it. Elsie wished she could count on her brother to go and see Doris. If she told her sister Joel might drop by for a visit, Doris would be disappointed if he didn’t follow through. Elsie was hesitant to say anything, so she decided to remain silent on the subject. Right now, she needed to go to Doris’s house and see how she was doing.
Berlin
“Here’s a cozy coverlet you can rest under while we’re waiting for your husband to get here. Is there anything else I can do for you before I head home?” Arlene asked as she gathered up her things.
“No, you and Elsie did enough today with all the baking you got done.” Doris placed the small covering next to her on the recliner. “Brian will be here soon, so you should both go home and tend to your families.” Doris had spent part of the day in the kitchen, with her broken leg propped on a stool, so she could visit with her sisters. The rest of the time she’d rested in Brian’s recliner. Sitting around so much got on her nerves. Doris had always been a doer, and watching others do all the work she should have been doing herself made her feel even worse.
Another thing that really bothered Doris was seeing Arlene’s baby, Samuel, laughing and rolling about in his playpen. It was wrong to be jealous, but she couldn’t help herself. She wanted nothing more than to have a child of her own and struggled with the thought that it might never happen.
Elsie stepped in front of Doris’s chair. “Are you sure you don’t want one of us to stay until Brian gets home from work? I’d be happy to do that.”
“No, you go ahead. I’ll stay right here in the recliner until he arrives, so don’t worry about me.”
Both sisters hesitated but finally nodded. “We’ll be back tomorrow, so don’t try to do anything on your own,” Arlene said.
She held up one hand. “I promise.”
After Elsie and Arlene left, Doris leaned her head back and closed her eyes, feeling drowsy. She was almost to the point of dozing off, when a knock sounded on the door, jolting her upright. Needing to see who it was, she grabbed her crutches and stood. When s
he hobbled across the room and opened the door, she was surprised to see her friend Anna on the porch.
“I’ve wanted to come by and see how you’re doing,” Anna said breathlessly, “but things have been busy at the schoolhouse with the Christmas program coming up soon, and I couldn’t get away.”
“Well, you’re here now, and I’m glad to see you.” Doris gestured with her head toward the living room. “Come inside and we can sit and visit.”
“Jah, we do need to sit, because you should get off your feet.” Anna removed her outer garments and draped them over a chair. “How are you feeling? Is your leg still painful?”
“It hurts sometimes,” Doris admitted. “It feels better when I keep it propped up.” She took a seat in the recliner, and Anna seated herself on the couch across from her.
“How are things at school? Do all the scholars know their parts for the program?”
“Some do, but others are having a hard time remembering their recitations.” Anna smiled. “I’m sure everyone will do fine on the evening of the program, though.”
“I remember when I was nine years old I was given a poem to recite. When I looked out and saw my parents that evening, I became naerfich and forgot what I was supposed to say.” Doris rubbed the bridge of her nose, as the embarrassment of the moment came back to her. She’d taken some teasing from Joel on the way home, and of course, he’d bragged about the fact that he’d done well with his part.
“I felt nervous during some of my Christmas programs when I was a girl, too.” Anna sat quietly, as though pondering something. Then she looked at Doris and said, “I’m sorry you lost your boppli. I know how much you looked forward to becoming a mamm.”
Tears welled in Doris’s eyes, but she tilted her head up and blinked to prevent them from falling onto her cheeks. “It’s hard to say this, but I guess it was not meant to be. Maybe Brian and I aren’t supposed to have any kinner.”
“Is that what you really think, or is it your way of accepting what happened?”